The mind of Matt
The mind of Matt
"I guess I will just wait till Lunch" Matt says to me again more thought of food and when he will eat again this is the on going game of this moment in life with Matt. This has been going on for a few days now and I spoke with Matt last night about giving him less food more often or if he would like to keep it the same, last night he chose to try less okay so lets try this.
This morning he forgot was not really talkative and when I asked him if he still wanted to try this he didnt answer at all I stood waiting for some time and still no answer okay then lets try the eating little bits more often and see how this goes.
I tell Matt after he question about lunch right after breakfast "Matt stop worrying about food go and have fun with yourself, you and your brother do not have to worry about anything I will take care of it all. go and have fun." Matts reply was first to just stare at me very upset like and then as he was heading to his room says " So I guess my life is just going down" "Matt" I reply "You just have to go have fun that is your life going up, nothing is better then fun"
In Matts mind at this moment food is everything I wish I could feed him as much as he wants to eat or at least a little less so he doesnt get ill, I wish he wasnt always so focused on food, I wish he wasnt so obsesed with food and worrying so much about it, I wish he could just relax.
Sometimes it seems we get so close just to end back here again.
And all I can do is know I am doing my very best and I love this guy so much I am willing to do this for him, I will be a little more patent, I will be a little more kind, I will be a little more loving.
<3 Joan Nielsen
