A mothers love

Helping Matt with his shower, he is happy and can talk a bit but understanding not everything.

I look at my son as he kind of wobbles unto the shower I have prepared for him, my heart aches some days it is so difficult to watch him do things that he cant remember to do.

Watching how this illness and pharmaceutical medication has taken its toll on his 29 year old body. Overly skinny, curved back and hair loss.

I feel for him, wishing I could do more for him.

I help him in the shower, remind him to get under the water, he smiles with a big grin as the water begins to hit his face reminding me of the little boy he once was and his love for water.

"Go all the way under Matt" I tell him.

He shuffles a little more under the water.

I wash his back and hair and remind him to wash the rest.

"Rinse off and out you come, don't forget your hair and back" I tell him.

No word spoken back, just smiles.

Out he comes towel to dry him when I realize he forgot to rinse his head. Its okay that's why I am here to help him out, back in he goes.

Rinsed, dried and jammies all comfy for the evening.

Yes sometimes its difficult to see this, to be in the moment of this, but always my love for this guy grows stronger, unconditionally and I know just how to help him.

I love my son.